> For The Love Of My Cousin 01

My cousin is a first year college student. She’s been into a lot of pressures I believe. Coming from a not-yet-that-developed-province,  I know the adjustments she had to deal with here in the big city.  Last week, she asked me to help her with some of her projects and so I obliged. Yes, without thinking.

Earlier, she sent me a message saying that she needs to pass the 5 essays tomorrow and I haven’t started anything yet. To cut the story short, the next 5 entries will be the essays I did for her. I apologize for the errors I can’t manage to check them anymore. I’m so tired and I still need to sleep. My cousin [right Bads?] from Singapore at the same time is asking a favor about the design of her new website. Scripting? Oh no!

A Symbol That Best Describes My Present Life [in this case, my cousins life]

I really thought this one will be an easy task. But, coming up with a personal symbol to represent my current state has proven otherwise. I tried to ask everybody in the household about their symbols. It has been fascinating to see what other people have chosen, a hummingbird, a yin-yang, a drop of water, a lotus blossom, a daisy, a crescent moon and why they chose those symbols.

It’s a fun, creative, and suprisingly thought-provoking exercise. I thought of impressing people. To be considered as a serious being, with depth and social class, I first thought of a book. Leatherbound, enticing, with slightly mysterious gilt letters on the spine. Beauty, intrigue, anticipation, delight. It’s all there. Just open the cover.

The quest for my life’s symbol has changed unexpectedly after few hours. It has been the owl, the butterfly, the ocean, the rising phoenix, a flower. Before I slept, I thought I’ll be firm with the dragonfly. A symbol of transformation, and more specifically, the colorful variety of dragonflies, as I found them in our front yard while I was still in Mindoro. I was intrigued by the fact that dragonflies are most commonly found near standing water, just like what we have on our front yard.

When it was time to put the thoughts into writings, I took time to really decipher my ownself. And there it was, my symbol is a tree. When I say “be a tree”, it instantly makes me feel connected, relaxed and present.

It came to me when I was thinking about how to make myself feel more grounded. It is something I think I have always struggled with and became more aware of in the past few years. I came from a family where in we can always speak our minds, share our views, speak of oneself. Most of the time, the conversation will turn into arguments and then my Mother will start her tirades and we will all end up laughing.  And so I think I want to be a tree. Yeah, I want trees. I love trees. I like how they are strong, how they change, how old they grow while bending and adjusting to the environment, living through the stormy and pleasant days, the textures, shapes and colors, how the branches look like hands and fingers outstretched open to the sky and earth… and most of all I love the roots – how they stabilize the rest of the tree, how deep they run and how strong they are – completely connected to the earth. The tree reminds me of the natural world of which I am an integral part.

I am a tree and instantly, I had a connection to it.



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