> Lost Friends

Oh hey, it’s you! Musta ka na?f3When I was in high school, I never understood how my parents could see friends of theirs after thirty-some years and act as if not a day had passed. After all, I hadn’t even been alive for thirty years and the idea of not seeing my friends for even longer than two weeks was frightening to me.f1Once I went away to college, months of not speaking with or seeing friends seemed reasonable and normal. Shortly after some time, I got used to the idea of being out of touch with friends for years at a time and not being sad about it or feeling awkward when we finally did speak.f4Recently, though, I’ve gotten back in touch with a couple of friends I haven’t spoken to for years, and it has felt like a long time [not just normal or something to get used to]. I just recently got back in touch with Deejay – my best buddy in college. We probably hadn’t spoken to each other in years. When we finally did catch up on the phone, she told me how she tried to be in touch with our other friends too.

We’d had some great times and shared a number of inside jokes together in school. I thought she already went back to Chicago and so I almost forgot her. But that’s one of those facts of life—you lose touch with people. Sometimes, you lose touch and it seems natural, since you were starting to grow apart anyway. Other times, you lose touch and it’s jarring. They became too busy, but you weren’t busy at all. They ended up not caring as much for the friendship as you did. They moved away and weren’t great about keeping in touch with people who weren’t physically close to them.

Now I’m missing my old friends and the funny thing, I miss my new friends too. It has not been quite the same for the past days. The things that have been happenning exhaust,  drain and consume us so much. I need a breather. Sigh.f2I suppose it’s one of the bittersweet pain-joys of being older—the ability to wonder about your old friends: What are they doing now? Why did we lose touch? Is it even worth reconnecting? Would it just be awkward? We would no longer have anything in common?

I may give in to the pressure and activate my Facebook. Or maybe I’ll just keep wondering…


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